Sometimes facing a normal day can be as scary as facing something new. In fact I am more intimidated by inaction than challenge. Waking up to a dark-house morning, I put myself through the paces of getting ready for work. Even though it is Friday, I do not feel any particular sense of excitement. A long day of work is ahead of me, and my supervisor has begun leaning on me to increase my production. That adds stress to my work day, because I like to set my own pace and take my time to do a thorough job. Having to rush things makes it easier to make mistakes, and I hate receiving my work back with adjustments to be made after I already thought it was complete. I want to be able to live up to my manager's expectations, but sometimes it feels impossible. It is difficult for me to walk into a situation where my failure is not only possible, but probable.
I have been praying about my job and asking God to help me to do good work every day. I feel like I am already doing the best I can on my own. It may take some sort of aha-moment or unseen hand to shift me from this rut I am in. Until that happens I choose to trust that God has placed me in a job where I cannot succeed to either teach me something or to help someone else in an unseen way. I can accept that. It is good to know that the situation lies in bigger and more capable hands than my own. My day begins. Here I go.
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